From the Desk of Althea Schottman

Date Posted: 09-25-2007

What Good is Marriage?

Well--for one thing, it brings conflict into our lives. Does it ever! Conflict between husbands and wives, parents and children, in-laws--the list goes on and on.

Wait. That doesn't sound like a good thing. Conflict feels awful, and sometimes gets a person stuck in a seemingly never-ending battle about the same old thing. Why is this a good thing?

To be honest, most people don't think about the deep things, things like their values and needs until these are challenged--until they are in conflict, in other words. So conflict can be a valuable time of reflection, self-definition, goal setting. Conflict can add depth to our lives. The trick is to make the conflict a time of opportunity rather than a time of defensiveness. There are creative ways to do this.

The next time you are in conflict, realize that this just might be a good opportunity.

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